better than Krispy Kreme?

I was visiting with my lovely neighbor today and her son kept asking when he could eat his donut. She kept saying "later," very much frustrating him, and I was amused at how similarly the same situation would have gone down at my house.  I mentioned to her that my sister gave me a very delicious recipe for donuts. I've made them only twice, but they are heavenly.  I couldn't stop thinking about them, so my girls and I decided that we needed to make a batch.  I'm sure she didn't make up the recipe, but I'm crediting Carol anyway since she introduced me to this delicious slice of fatty, sugary bliss.

Carol's Donuts

2 T. yeast

⅓ c. warm water

1½ c. whole milk

5 T. butter

¼ c. sugar

1 ½ t. salt

2 eggs

23 oz. flour (must be weighed)

Combine yeast and water in mixing bowl.  In small saucepan over low heat, stir together milk, butter, sugar and salt until butter just melts.  Add to yeast mixture.  Add eggs and flour and mix together (dough should be light and sticky). Cover and let rise until doubled (about 1 hour).  Roll out dough on floured surface to about 1" thick.  Cut into donut shapes.  Let rise another 30 minutes.  Deep fry donuts in med-hi oil until golden.  (don't have the oil too hot or the donuts will be dark on the outside and raw in the middle.  Drain on paper towels.  Roll in sugar or drizzle with glaze if desired.

just after they were cut out

YUMMY!

I dipped the girls' donuts in a runny glaze of powdered sugar, milk and vanilla, then added sprinkles.  For the adults (ie: me), I coated them in white cane sugar with a small amount of cinnamon added.  I let the girls have one donut and 2 holes.  I think I ate 4 donuts and no less than 6 holes and then was comatose on the couch until my stomach ache subsided.  I do not, under any circumstances, recommend eating that many in one sitting.  You WILL pay a harsh price.

superheros to the rescue

A new client contacted me a month ago (well, she tried to), but being that I've been in absentia from my blog and FB page most of Feburary, I got the message on Friday. Evidently my "fantastic" customer service didn't turn her completely off to me. It turned out that she wanted cupcakes for her son's superhero birthday party, but assumed it was too late as she needed them the next day. Normally, that would be a safe assumption, but I had the afternoon off from my kids and had only planned on being lazy, so I was able to fill the order for her. I've had a break from cakes lately, so I was happy to have some time alone to be artistic.

I made a plan, bought a few supplies and went to work on the Hulk, Thor, Spiderman, Captain America, Iron Man, and the Silver Surfer whom I'd never heard of...probably because I have girls. We know Strawberry Shortcake, My Little Pony, Hello Kitty and the like, but superheros are not really on our radar. As girly as my daughters are, they did think the superhero cupcakes turned out pretty cool.

So, here they are...

the Silver Surfer

Spiderman

Thor

Iron Man

Hulk

Captain America

This leads me to wonder why no kid ever wants a super villain birthday party.

fixing other people's stupid mistakes

I feel like, in my house, I'm constantly fixing other people's mistakes.  Most of these blunders are thanks to the  former home-owners who either hired a brainless contractor or thought they were good at doing it themselves.  Not all DIY'ers are created equal.  I beg to argue that these people were not even adequate at their DIY projects - at least the ones they did here.  For example, none of the doors in my house are balanced.  They all swing either open or shut which is very annoying and not terribly easy to fix.  Another example?  They re-did the basement and apparently covered electrical junction boxes; our electrician is pretty convinced they did anyway.  We had to hire him to fix some of their blunders when nothing I did could make the bedroom light work (and I'm not without knowledge of the craft; I have wired an entire basement before to pass inspection with flying colors).

My latest fix-it project has been to basically "grout" the wood flooring in my kitchen.  When the pre-finished floors were installed, they did not properly acclimate to the climate and humidity of the house before they were installed.  I'm guessing that the owners did not care how it turned out as they were dumping the house on the next unsuspecting buyers.  Either that or they just didn't have a clue.  I've worked on wood flooring installation before and it's imperative that one uses the correct tools.

The first winter we had here, the floor boards formed major cracks, some almost 1/4" wide between planks.  If this were an old farm house, I'd have thought it was charming, but as I swept and mopped my floor, I noticed the cracks filling in with crumbs and dirt. So a few times a year, I'd take a tooth brush and vacuum cleaner and try to clean them out, inch by inch.  Because I usually have an extra 4 hours in my schedule.

This year, I decided to do a temporary fix and I really don't know if it's going to work, so I can't nessesarily recommend this to you who may have a similar problem.  I filled in all the cracks with wood filler.  It was a very annoying project, but it may end up saving me lots of frustration in cleaning later.  However, the filler may crack under the pressure of summer humidity and all fall out, but that's a risk I am willing to take.

I tried to take a picture of what my pre-finished floors SHOULD look like when properly installed, but I couldn't find one joint in my entire house that was tight.  So here's my before and after pictures.

Before

notice the lovely dirt.

After 

Not horrible.

It's ugly flooring, so I'm hoping to rip it all out in the next couple years anyway.  All that work for nothing?  No way.  I won't have to clean out the cracks for at least 6 months!

I want to slap you

***DISCLAIMER***

I'm sure you've all already read a blog or post somewhere about this very subject, but below is my two cents.

********

You know those people who offer fantastic parenting advice? They have the amazing ability to make you stop complaining almost before you start to unload about your current parenting predicaments. Be it uncomfortable pregnancies, sleepless nights, feeding troubles, permanent markers on the walls, potty training, temper tantrums, sassy backtalk, fighting about appropriate attire or any other number of woes we experience before our direct parenting job is over, these women know just what to say to get you to shut up.  It's like a Christmas miracle how quickly you move on to another subject.

The advice is simple and to the point, as is your response of a flamboyant "Oh, yes! Thanks for the reminder," followed by a polite laugh.

What is it that these people say that makes you suddenly stop complaining and move on to another subject?

It is 3 simple words:

"Enjoy every moment."

Yes, those 3 little words - that are usually followed by a smug "Before you know it, they'll be out of the house!" - are very powerful in getting us to stop complaining.

Instead of a polite laugh and change of subject, here is a small sample of my list of sassy replies that you may choose from the next time you encounter such gracious advice:

-I'm sorry? What part of being deliriously tired to the point of hallucination should I enjoy?

-Really, I should enjoy the sassy remarks my tween makes when I ask him to pick up his dirty socks?

-Can you please tell me how to thoroughly appreciate cleaning up pee all over the house?

-My son just got charged with possession of crack. You're right, this is lovely!

-Oh, I am! I've never had so much fun with sciatica before.

-You're absolutely right, getting up at midnight and 4am to change my daughter's sheets is the best!

-Why don't you come over and clean up the puke all over the living room carpet and then tell me how enjoyable it was for you?

-I can't believe I've let those moments pass me by. I'll start enjoying the screaming and crying during my migraine.

-Come over here so I can smack you.

I'm sure you could think of many more, so feel free to be creative!

Yes, I, like all moms, realize that in a blink my children will be off to college and I will miss them terribly, but did you really just tell me to enjoy the crappy moments of being a parent? Did YOU enjoy those moments or are you simply rubbing in the fact that you don't have to deal with them any more?

I remember reading a Facebook post several years ago of a woman asking for ideas of how to get through the last few weeks of her pregnancy, chasing around an active toddler with her back in such pain that she could hardly function. I kid you not, among the list of practical advice she received, someone actually said, "enjoy this time with your son." I wanted to slap her on behalf of my friend.

Don't get me wrong, being a mother is the most rewarding and wonderful experience I've ever had the pleasure to experience. My daughters give me so much joy and love that I sometimes wonder why we didn't start our family sooner.  I love them so much it hurts and they are very well behaved little girls. I've long been an advocate of trying to make the most out of every day, but some days are filled with so much frustration that I am simply just trying to survive. I'm pretty sure that my parenting experience is not terribly different from other mothers' experiences (other than the fact that my children are nearly perfect in every way). I have talked to honest, down-to-earth mothers who have admitted that there are moments, days or long periods of frustration, exhaustion and even deep sorrow. I can't imagine that the loving parents of a child who has been checked into drug rehab at the tender age of 15 is enjoying that period of time; and the parents of the child who is being bullied at school is not fully appreciating those "moments."

I'm guessing that these cheerful people give these "words of wisdom" for many different reasons. Maybe they really do think they are giving good advice because of the polite reply they are given by the rest of us. Perhaps they feel uncomfortable with people's frustration, so they say something off the cuff to avoid their own discomfort. Some probably have grown children that are wonderful contributing members of society and mother has completely forgotten the day-to-day frustrations she experienced; I think (or hope) this is probably the most likely reason. Or there are those that are completely living in a dream world to block out some painful reality with which they live. Whatever their reasons, I wish they'd try to be a tiny bit empathetic.

So here's my unsolicited advice. When someone is honest enough to tell you that she is not enjoying motherhood that day, don't make her feel stupid or guilty for complaining.  Just listen and say something useful like, "It sucks, but you'll be ok." or "I've been there. Don't worry, this will pass."  or maybe simply offer to pray for her. That has the power to make her feel a little bit normal and can actually encourage her to make it through another day when she feels like giving up.

There, I've said it. It's my rant for the month. I'm hoping my next post will be something delicious or pretty.

pop tarts gone terribly right!

I found a recipe on the Food Network site for homemade toaster pastries that didn't look all that great because whoever created it used shortenning.  Who eats that crap, anyway?  But I liked the idea and came up with a similar recipe made with good old fashioned butter that turned out quite delicious.  So I decided to share it with you.  I'm so very nice, aren't I?

My 5 year old daughter was in charge of taking pictures and she didn't do too bad.  She probably took 4 dozen as she filled up what was left of my SD card, so I had a lot to choose from.

I decided upon strawberry and chocolate toaster pastries and not to toot my own horn, but they're pretty darn good.  (Who am I kidding? I love to toot my own horn; isn't that what blogging is all about?)

Here's the basic recipe:

Pastry dough
2 1/2 cups all purpose flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
1/2 c. (1 stick) of cold butter
3/4 c. milk
1 egg plus 2 tbsp. water (whisked together)

In a food processor, pulse together flour, baking powder, salt and butter until butter is incorporated into pea-size and smaller chunks.  Pour into a mixing bowl and add milk.  Stir with a spatula to incorporate.  When it becomes a dough consistency, turn out onto a floured surface.  Roll dough to 1/8 inch or less.  Cut into rectangles measuring 4" by 5".  Add 1-2 tablespoons of preserves, jam or other desired filling to half of the pastry rectangles, spreading to about an inch from the edges.  Brush edges with egg wash and top with another rectangle of dough, making sure to gently press air from the pocket.  Use a fork to seal the edges.  Gently press the top of the pastry to make sure the filling is evenly spread.  Prick the tops with the fork and place on an un-greased cookie sheet.  Bake at 350 F for about 20 minutes.  They aren't supposed to be brown at all, but I found that the pastry was a little flakier and had a more buttery flavor if they are very slightly golden.

Store them in a ziplock for a few days or in the freezer for up to a month.

 

 

this is one of the fillings I used.  YUM!

Hot out of the oven!

This is the other filling...DOUBLE YUM!

Chocolate Filling:
1 bag of Guittard semi sweet chocolate chips
approx. 1/4 c. heavy cream

Melt chocolate in a double boiler.  Add cream and stir until shiny and smooth.  You're looking for a little thicker than a fondue consistency.  Allow to cool to room temperature before filling pastries.

Optional Icing Glaze (but don't add this unless you're using a toaster oven or until after you've toasted them in a regular toaster or you'll have a mess!):
1 cup powdered sugar
2 tbsp. milk or cream
1/2 tsp. pure vanilla

I made my icing pink and added red and pink sprinkles.  As I was doing this I thought how cute these would be made into heart shapes for Valentine's day.  I think I might have to make a yummy, flaky, chocolate-filled, heart-shaped breakfast in a few weeks.  YUM!

Llama Llama Red Pajama

I have the exciting privilege to be a part of the world premier of the stage musical Llama Llama Red Pajama at Stages Theatre Company.  It's a clever adaptation of Dewdney's adorable childrens book that follows the plight of 6 individual baby llamas and their adventures in bedtime drama.  Each mama llama is trying to get chores done and relax a little while her baby llama doesn't want to go to sleep.

The show opened on January 13, 2012 and runs for 5 weeks.  If you are local and interested in attending, you can find information on the Stages Theater's website here.  I would say that it's geared towards children under age 8, but there's enough action and humor in it to keep most kids and adults interested too.  And if you're a mom, you can identify with a lot of it...just like in the book!

So for openning night, I made a little treat for the cast party.  This one has a special place in my heart because I get to be a part of the production.

There are 6 baby llamas and 6 mama llamas in the show and each has it's own distinct personality and interests.

There are 6 baby llama in red pajamas...

one baby llama who loves to read.

 

a tap dancing llama

a drama llama actress

a golfing baby llama

a soccer llama

a llama magician 

and their mamas...a gardener, a yoga instructor, a clean freak, a dancer, a trumpet player and a very pregnant llama mama.

We had a great opening and are looking forward to a very fun run!  Come out to see this book on stage!

Llama Llama Red Pajama

by Anna Dewdney

Stages Theatre Company

Adaptation written by Jennifer Kirkeby

Music by Shirley Mier

Directed by Sandy Boren-Barrett

LIKE STAGES THEATRE on FACEBOOK!

a tractor and a drunk cow

I've often given my friend Shanna crap because she doesn't say "no."  She emails me and complains about the stressful situations she's gotten into because she won't turn clients away.  Not to worry, she dishes it back to me.  She's much busier than I am with her cake making business, but she's been doing it longer.  She's my inspiration, my cookbook and my mentor, via Facebook.  She's really quite amazing.  It's not that I look for opportunities to outshine her (OK, yes I do), but for some reason I take on projects to which I should be saying "no."

Now that the cake turned out to my liking, I can openly admit that I should have said, "I don't have a clue how to do that, so go somewhere else" to my last client who wanted a copy of a Cletrac Crawler tractor for her father's birthday cake.  But I'm too proud to say "I can't."  Instead I said, "Sure! I can do that for you!"

I emailed Shanna for support, "A TRACTOR CAKE? WHAT DID I JUST AGREE TO?!!"  She was very sweet and supported and started by advising me to join the Can't Say No Anonymous support group and ended with a sarcastic "good luck."  I think I could actually hear her snickering under her breath in the email.  I took it as a challenge.

So, I got a little information and a picture or two from my very sweet client and went to work.  She said that "Rug" is a rather simple farmer who loves his tractor, his black Angus cows and his beer.  He also loves grilling - and it made me want to grill up a big juicy Porterhouse.

Here's the cake, complete with strategically placed mud and a lager-drinking Angus (betcha can't say that fast 10 times) I have to admit, this was a very fun cake to make and I'm pretty darn impressed with myself, if I do say so...and I do.

Let the being impressed with me commence.